Saturday, May 16, 2009

We've become Garbage Diggers...

Since I was a young girl, about ten, it has happened almost like clockwork. If there was a "big and stressful" event happening in my life, my body carried me through the event and then I would inevitably get sick and sprout a cold sore afterward.

This year we were hit with B's Bday, Easter, and B's Baptism - all within three weeks of each other. I was overloaded with worries about money to pay for it all. I was overloaded with worries of finishing invitations for both of Berk's B-day parties (family and friends) AND invites for her Baptism. I was dumb enough to overload myself with preparations for Berk's first "friend" sleepover b-day party. I was overloaded worrying about Steve's family, his new wife's family, and my family -- all in the same room together for the first time since the divorce. I was OVERLOADED! that these events were passed... my bottom lip was trying it's best to "keep the tradition" of cold sores alive. I could feel the "tingling" all over my bottom lip, and I was looking frantically for my cold sore medication. Catching the cold sore in it's "tingling" phase can sometimes help one to avoid an outbreak altogether. Especially if you apply ice quickly to the area and apply thes new medicine I've been using.

It's called "Abreva". Guaranteed to knock a cold sore's "healing time" in half. You get a measely inch-and-a-half of it for about the cost of FIVE happy meals. Yep. $20 bucks for two grams. (I'm guessing that crack might be cheaper?) It's insane. But, here's the thing -- It works. And for those who suffer from cold sores often, getting rid of them quickly is worth the money - if you have it.

I digress. So, I mentioned above, I'm feeling the "tingling" and looking frantically for the medication. I know EXACTLY where it was the night before...and the only person I thought had been near the area long enough to mess with it...was Berkeley. So I asked/accused/badgered her all night about where she could have possibly put it/knocked it/lost it. She continued to deny having touched it at all. I look everywhere and finally give up, heading to bed with a prayer that I don't wake up with a giant, bubbly, blistery lip.

Then next day...the girls and I are in the car and I decided to ask Kenna if she moved Mom's little, blue, tube of medicine. She - knowing how frustrated I was when I questioned Berk the night before -carefully says "Yah...I put some of the lipstick on my baby's lips yesterday and then it was gone - so I threw it in the garbage." Berkeley gasps. My stomach sinks. Yesterday when it "got lost" it was a brand, new tube. How could it possibly be ALL GONE?. I'm thinking about that baby doll's lips and how small they are...there just HAS to be some left! I quiz Kenna some more about -which- garbage can she put it in. At this point...we have NO money to buy more...and I'm getting desperate to treat my lip before a breakout emerges.

Berk and I both dive for the bedroom garbage can when we get home. We find the tube in there and it is, in fact, empty. Twenty freaking dollars wasted on a BABY DOLL! When you are dirt poor, little things like this can really be frustrating. I held it together though. Berk exclaims - "SEE, I TOLD YOU I DIDN'T TAKE IT, MOM!" I had to totally apologize to Berk for accusing her. I explained to Kenna that we NEVER play with Mommy's medicine. Then I squeeze the tiniest bit left out of the bent tube and rub it on my lower lip. Truly there is nothing I can do about it now. So all I can do is shrug it off.

If that freaking doll gets a cold sore, I'm gonna be pissed.