Sunday, January 25, 2009

Cinderella Poopy Pants...


Nothing makes me and Berkeley smile & laugh harder than when McKenna tells me that she wants some "CRAPtain Crunch" for breakfast. No matter how many times I say "CAPtain Crunch? Okay, lets go get you some" -- she still says it the same way the next time around. She does this unintentionally (as far as I can tell). The innocence in it is what makes it so completely funny. It's not gross, like my brother's "gross" humor growing up.

Randy and his friends could spend hours laughing over one, raunchy, fart. The word "buttercup" comes to mind...and it isn't a happy memory. (Shame on big brothers EVERYWHERE for ever doing this to your little sisters!) My eyes are watering now, as I try not to remember.

I wasn't raised a "prude" though, at our house growing up you had to belch at LEAST a seven to even call yourself a "family member." Mom won't admit it now, but she got in on a few contests...and she was the one who started "rating" them, if I remember correctly.

In college, I am embarrassed (now) to say that my GRAND "belching ability" was no secret among my roomies. One of my six roommates was dating a football player, who belched one night in our dorm room. I mentioned that it was a bit "weak"...and that's when the "challenge" began. HE WAS WARNED not to challenge me...but he didn't listen. While sparing you the details...I proudly put him to shame. It was cool to beat the six-foot-tall, "tough guy", but this talent has NOT won me a lot of dates or admiration from the boys over the years. It comes across as "un-lady-like" for some reason ???

So, that said, I have tried so hard NOT to instill in my daughters, the great art of "Fart and Poop Humor." I don't know...it IS funny at times...but who is going to date the girls in college who can make fart sounds with their armpits? Am I wrong? Therefore, I go about my days trying to keep the little princesses
"Fart-Humor-Free."

I am not succeeding in the least bit.
This was the conversation in the car last week:



(McKenna is singing a Cinderella song and adding the word "poop poop!" in after every stanza.)

Mom says:
"Kenna...There's no "POOP POOP" in the Cinderella story!"

Kenna argues:
"Yes DEHR iz! I read about Cinderella...She wived (lived) in a castle! And she pooped all day!"

(Berkeley and McKenna break into laughter in the back seat.)

Then Berkeley chimes in:
"YAH! And I read about Cinderella -- She left her shoe --the ONE shoe...And guess what the Prince saw in it? POOP!"

(More hysterical laughter in the back seat from them both.)

McKenna chimes in again:
"Cinderella...she had POOP on her blue wedding dress!!! Hahahahaha!"

(They keep laughing. I just shake my head, keep driving, and try not to smile or laugh too hard.)

Then later in that week....
The girls had gone down for bed, but were being restless and not going to sleep.

I holler to them from the livingroom:
"McKenna....You need to settle down! And Berkeley....I heard you talking too..."

The girls are silent...but I hear a "flatulent-like sound" from the bedroom.

McKenna (in some effort not to get in trouble again...and to try to protect Berkeley) yells:
"That was Berkeley's butt!"

(I think it is funny...but stay silent. The quiet resumes. Then I hear another "toot":)

McKenna yells:
"That was her butt again!"

Looks like somebodys butt is going to get a "time-out" if it doesn't pipe down soon!

9 comments:

jhainesfam said...

I love this post. It reminds me how some of mine and Brian's conversations are. His poor step-mom has to put up with a lot between him and his sister they are just like that too.

Melanie said...

Hey Jeanna! Hope you guys are well. It's good to know I'm not alone in my brotherly torture...which does extend into adulthood, dang it! Love, Mel

Ms. Crackers said...

I'm sorry my husband tortured---tortures---you. I guess you won't be surprised that he does it to your nieces, too!

I don't think that stuff is THAT funny, but sometimes it is and you can't help but laugh. Girls eventually grow out of it---I think.

This may help them when they start hanging out with boys; at least they won't be offended or surprised. (I actually know someone who GROUNDS her kids for farting or burping in front of her, I kid you not.)

SA Woodward Family said...

I vaguely remember you and Nick battling it out. In our family it is also a prerequisite to be able to do both. Last night I was talking on Skype with my brother and his boys and they were stinking up the room. Their mom wasn't there or she would have put them to shame. I love little kids and the funny things they come up with. Amy

Blaise Glaze said...

I love Raven's messed up words. He used to see a cement mixer and get all excited about the "sea-mixie!!" Or I would tell him to get off the couch and do this or that and he would say "Mama! I'm crunchtable!" (comfortable)
Luckily (I guess) I grew up without siblings... until I was 8, then I was the elder ;)

Lori England said...

It has been a trip down memory lane bloging with you, Amy and Teresa! Just so everyone know I was one of Mel's roommates at Snow. I forgot about you and Nick having a contest. I do remember how embarasses you were that you won, but you just had to prove you were the best! Has anyone heard from him?
I saved your blog in my favorites so everytime i went to it up came the one of your daughter sleeping. I kept thinking when is Mel going to post again. I am still tech chalanged!
But I finaly figured it out!

Julie said...

We recently had an incident with a "spaceSHIP." I'll let you imagine how that word was mispronounced. Man, I laughed so hard. Does that make me a bad Mom? Seriously, I really could not help it.

Val said...

OK seriously I had forgotten all about the "buttercups" I am dry heaving as we speak. That is something that I had repressed till now and it all came swarming back. I enjoyed this post. No matter how hard you try potty talk is always a apart of a young ones life. But thank goodness you have girls you should here the potty talk from Thaddeus. He is true boy and I am sure Randy would be pleased. You can imagine. I for one always admired the belching ability you were good!!!!! I think we were almost kicked out of Omega once for such a beautiful display of talent. (he he he)

Val said...

make that here a hear!!!!!!